Hot in Herre (and I'm Herre to Hellp)

You're not following the weather in Denver.  If you were, you'd know it's hot.

Nonetheless, your pal offers this (self-created) drink to help you beat the heat:

Bad Apple

• One (1) 16.9 oz. can Strongbow cider*
• One (1) or two (2) oz. bourbon**, depending on how gully you are
• Ice

Combine; drink; listen to the Mountain Goats; wonder what happened to that Rake's Progress guy who used to be funny and post alla time. 

* Or whatever.  Woodchuck is good, if sweet.  Hornsby's is OK, if you insist.
** I suggest Corner Creek, if you can get it.